Stereotyping Steve's Guide to the World, Part II: Pembroke Pines, Florida

Overview

Pembroke Pines is first and foremost a peaceful and welcoming township. It should therefore not be confused with Pembroke, the bustling metropolis of southwest England. It should also not be confused with Silver Pines, located just a few exits north of the I-75. In fact its probably best not to confuse it with anything, really. Moving on, Pembroke Pines takes its name, apparently, from the mighty Pembroke Pine:


Population: 9,455 (2004, est.)

Local attractions: null

Curious Fact: Inhabitants of Pembroke Pines are nicknamed Pembroke Pines. Thus, if you were to live in Pembroke Pines, you would essentially be a Pembroke Pine.

Most Pressing Issue: Dwindling Population of Pembroke Pines in Pembroke Pines.

There are, the Pembroke Pines maintain, lots of Pembroke Pines to be found in Pembroke Pines. Their population, however is dwindling, according to University of Pembroke Pines herbologist Dr. Pembroke K. Pines (pictured right). Indeed, Dr. Pembroke Pines is alarmed at the shrinking numbers of Pembroke Pines in Pembroke Pines, and although the Pembroke Pines may claim that the Pembroke Pine is bountiful in Pembroke Pines, Pembroke Pines would argue that the Pembroke Pine is in fact an endangered specimen in the Pembroke Pines ecosystem, and that soon the Pembroke Pines will have no choice but to rename Pembroke Pines Pembroke Pine, and in a more distant future something to the effect of "Complement of Pembroke Pine," or perhaps "Distant Memory of Pembroke Pines." A foreseeable issue, therefore, is what will the Pembroke Pines of Pembroke Pines be nicknamed if the Pembroke Pine becomes extinct in Pembroke Pines as Pembroke Pines would have us anticipate? Troubled times ahead, to be sure.

-Steve